Sipping my coffee, begging the exhaustion to go away but, coffee can't fix the exhaustion I'm feeling. I am exhausted by life. I am tired, beat down, confused. Things are coming from all angles of life lately and I just can't seem to make sense of it. It feels like God has dropped the ball of my life and let everything rattle around a bit. But, I know that's not true. God knows exactly what is happening and why and HE is the only one who can help me.
If you don't have "My Utmost for His Highest," by Oswald Chambers I seriously recommend it. As I was reading the entry for today, I was pierced by this statement, "God does not give us overcoming life; He gives us life as we overcome." That is just like Him; to take something bad and make it good. To overcome is to defeat something, and before that something is defeated you need to fight it. That's the hard part but also the great part. That is where I am, the fighting part (if you can call thrashing wildly and erratically at my "somethings" fighting). It is hard and confusing but God is still in it. The great thing about fighting is that you become desperately dependent on Jesus during that time. It can feel like we are alone but feelings are not truth. In reality we are never alone. "Do not be afraid, for I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand," Isaiah 41:10. In times of trouble I often come to this verse. I always think of that last sentence as stages of hardship. Stage 1; tired, weary, loosing the will to fight- Jesus gives us strength. Stage 2; faltering, failing, loosing the battle all together- Jesus comes right beside us and helps us fight. Stage 3; giving in to the enemy, succumbing, pure exhaustion- Jesus fights for us with His VICTORIOUS right hand. No matter where we are in the fight, Jesus is always with us. No matter how alone we feel it does not change that fact.
Life as we overcome. The process of overcoming is like a slow death of parts of ourselves (a good thing as we are to die to ourselves and live for Christ). But, without Christ it cannot be done. He is the only one who can turn death to life, evil to good, sadness to joy, weeping to praising. I am so thankful for Him. This time I am in is just like the winter; periods of coldness, bitterness, and whipping winds, but also times of peaceful sunshine in which I can feel Jesus' presence heavy around me.
We can have life while overcoming, we just need to lay on the altar of the One who gives life.
Jesus, thank you for never leaving us. Thank you for times of fighting and for the hope of overcoming. Do not let us become dismayed, but make us cling to You always.
If you don't have "My Utmost for His Highest," by Oswald Chambers I seriously recommend it. As I was reading the entry for today, I was pierced by this statement, "God does not give us overcoming life; He gives us life as we overcome." That is just like Him; to take something bad and make it good. To overcome is to defeat something, and before that something is defeated you need to fight it. That's the hard part but also the great part. That is where I am, the fighting part (if you can call thrashing wildly and erratically at my "somethings" fighting). It is hard and confusing but God is still in it. The great thing about fighting is that you become desperately dependent on Jesus during that time. It can feel like we are alone but feelings are not truth. In reality we are never alone. "Do not be afraid, for I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand," Isaiah 41:10. In times of trouble I often come to this verse. I always think of that last sentence as stages of hardship. Stage 1; tired, weary, loosing the will to fight- Jesus gives us strength. Stage 2; faltering, failing, loosing the battle all together- Jesus comes right beside us and helps us fight. Stage 3; giving in to the enemy, succumbing, pure exhaustion- Jesus fights for us with His VICTORIOUS right hand. No matter where we are in the fight, Jesus is always with us. No matter how alone we feel it does not change that fact.
Life as we overcome. The process of overcoming is like a slow death of parts of ourselves (a good thing as we are to die to ourselves and live for Christ). But, without Christ it cannot be done. He is the only one who can turn death to life, evil to good, sadness to joy, weeping to praising. I am so thankful for Him. This time I am in is just like the winter; periods of coldness, bitterness, and whipping winds, but also times of peaceful sunshine in which I can feel Jesus' presence heavy around me.
We can have life while overcoming, we just need to lay on the altar of the One who gives life.
Jesus, thank you for never leaving us. Thank you for times of fighting and for the hope of overcoming. Do not let us become dismayed, but make us cling to You always.